Sunday, April 20, 2008

Just rewards

TROPHIES! The British Academy Television Awards, BBC One, 8.00pm

Yes, it's that time again, the British Academy Television Awards. We know the film BAFTAs were a little underwhelming, but tonight is the more lowculture friendly ceremony anyway.

With LC favourites such as Harry Hill's TV Burp, Peep Show, Gavin and Stacey, Boy A, Cranford, Life on Mars, Secret Life, Coming Down The Mountain, Skins, Rome, The Street, Stricly Come Dancing, The Apprentice, Never Mind the Buzzcocks, QI, EastEnders and Holby City there are very few categories in which we would quibble with any of the choices. Except perhaps if Benidorm wins best sitcom. Be warned, though, the whole thing lasts a whopping three hours...

BABIES! Gavin and Stacey, BBC Three, 9.00pm

Speaking of award-winning shows, the second series of Gavin and Stacey concludes tonight as Gavin and Stacey face the question of whether to live in Essex, Barry or break up and Nessa goes into labour.

Other than a couple of slightly saggy episodes in the middle, this series has maintained the quality of the first. It's been warm, engaging and very funny. As one review we read said, it's a show where there are no baddies, where you are rooting for all the characters.

This finale ticks all the boxes (well mostly, there are still some elements left unresolved by the end - but that's what third series are for) - laughter, sadness, awkwardness, loveliness and Bryn's musical taste. The cast are outstanding tonight, and if James Corden, Ruth Jones, Matthew Horne and Joanna Page don't move you to a little sniffle by the end, then you are a cold, cold person indeed.

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Friday, April 18, 2008

Baby, I Swear it's Deja Vu

REPETITIVE! The soaps, various channels and times

We've noticed something rather annoying in soapland lately - they are all reusing each other's plots. Now we know this is common practice but we're far more used to them recycling their own (yes Hollyoaks with your incest, Neighbours with your infertility=baby, EastEnders with your sleazy teenage girl/dirty old man affairs). Anyway, here's your guide to the current soap plots, and where you may have seen them before...

Emmerdale currently has Laurel's potential babies-switched-at-birth storyline going on (with a DR MARSHALL, which was the name of the resident awesome all-powerful Neighbours doctor who came inbetween Clive Gibbons and Karl Kennedy), the like of which you may remember cropping up last year in both Neighbours and Coronation Street, the soap currently vying with EastEnders over which child of a controlling parent is the most batshit crazy - David Platt or Steven Beale?

Neighbours is currently being rocked by the SCANDALOUS teacher/pupil affair between Rachel and Angus. You may remember this plotline from such stories as, err Libby and Taj in Neighbours, Becca and Justin in Hollyoaks, Emma and, er, Craig McLachlan's character, in Home and Away and Michelle and Geoff in EastEnders (what do you mean storylines from the early '90s about university lecturers and mature students don't count?).

Home and Away is currently thieving from its Aussie neighbour in not-one-but-two-count-em storylines. Firstly, they have a very boring journo story with Belle, mimicking Neighbours' very boring journo story with Elle. (And Riley. And its previous ones with Scott and Libby and umpteen others). The other robbed story involves physio Sam giving a fatal injection to Johnny, in a sort-of-echo of Erinsborough's amazing FakeDoc story last year (and FakeDoc herself has rocked up in Summer Bay recently as another character. Coincidence? I think not?). Will Sam join the current line-up of soap characters perhaps getting away with murder? Hollyoaks' Warren looks set to join that elusive club, which also includes Paul Robinson from, yes, you guessed it, Neighbours.

And a mini-spoiler for next week's Coronation Street (skip to the next paragraph to avoid): according to my TV guide, 'Paul heads to the Police Station. Will he confess to the arson attack?' which, word for word, could be a summary of a Neighbours storyline not so long ago. They didn't even bother changing the character name.

Talking of not changing the character name, EastEnders has completely lifted the character and storylines of Clare from Hollyoaks and placed then in Albert Square. Let's hope she also gets to strut around in a red coat, cheat death in a red coat and fly away, head held high, in a red coat. Hollyoaks has also been attempting the soap-geek makeover (seen everywhere, but most famously in Plain-Jane-superbrain from Neighbours) on Elliot, with mixed results so far, it has to be said.

Even last night's rubbish 'Sean pretends Gus has eaten his dog. LOL!!11!!' story in EastEnders has echoes of the time Neighbours attempted to go multicultural with the Lim family and Julie Martin thought they, too, had eaten a dog.

Oh, and think The Archers is immune to all this? Think again. It's just had a rape trial, and we all know rape is the fall-back storyline option in Hollyoaks...

Labels: , , , , , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
4 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Thursday, April 17, 2008

Two's company

SERIOUS! Looking for Dad, BBC Two, 9.00pm
FRIVOLOUS! The Graham Norton Show, BBC Two, 7.00pm

We thought we'd just take a moment today to celebrate BBC Two. We like all the telly channels in the world, generally (except, at the moment, ITV1 and their refusal to show the full series of Pushing Daisies but we're sure we'll get over it in time), but there's something quite special about BBC Two and the way it has perhaps the most diverse programming line-up of all the channels right now, yet pretty much all its shows manage to feel at home there. No mean feat.

Tonight is a perfect example of the diversity of the channel. At 7.00pm, we have a one-off documentary, Looking for Dad. Let's overlook the fact that the title was used for a Channel 4 documentary a few years ago and accentuate the positive: it's a journey of filmmaker Charlie Russell and his brother to try and find out something about their estranged father (WHO IS DEAD. Ahem. Sorry). They use clues from his flat, meet his friends and family and try to discover who he really was. It's an unusual choice for this timeslot, and if you're bored of the drugs and incest shenanigans in Hollyoaks and the never-ending wedding saga in EastEnders, this may be worth a shot. It will almost certainly have more heart.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is the return of The Graham Norton Show. Although it is essentially So Graham Norton with fewer vibrator jokes, it still works as a format - partly because Graham can still be funny when he wants to be (the interludes in the group songs in I'd Do Anything not so much), but mainly because most of his guests are good sports who are up for a laugh and thus there tends to be a great rapport between Norton, the guests, the audience and the assorted strange people on the phone or internet. We much prefer this show in short, weekly runs like this to the nightly, years-long marathon that was V Graham Norton, too. Tonight's guests are Tony Curtis, Kevin Bacon and Robyn. How eclectic. How very BBC Two.

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Let's hear it for the boys

GAYS! Desperate Housewives, Channel 4, 10.00pm

Desperate HousewivesDespite being a prime contender for the gayest show on television (it's a three-horse race between this, Ugly Betty and Strictly Come Dancing, as far as we can tell), it's taken a surprisingly long time for any actual bummers to turn up on Wisteria Lane. There was Andrew, of course, but he seems to have been neutered ever since he got that personality transplant in the middle of season three. So it is with open arms that we welcome Bob and Lee, the first Desperate Househusbands, to the neighbourhood.

Susan's thrilled that her life has suddenly upgraded from CBS to Showtime, and wastes absolutely no time in running over to greet her new neighbours, proceeding to make an ass of herself in the way that only Susan can. Her initial attempts at claiming the role of Wisteria Lane's first fag hag fall flat after she mistakenly infers the presence of a third party in the relationship ("yes," mocks Lee. "We're gay Mormons.") and attempts to pass off shop-bought cookies as her own hand-baked goods. When these tactics fail to impress, she resorts to dognapping to get the new boys on side. We'd say it makes sense when you see it in context, but let's be realistic: this is Susan. Of course it doesn't.

Elsewhere, there's a delightful scene involving Edie's gynaecologist (the way he breaks the news to her that she has crabs is inspired), Orson does tricks on a scooter down Wisteria Lane, and Katherine's aunt Lilian returns home to die, and is played by one of our favourite actresses for any part involving an old lady serving as a plot point, Ellen Geer. The only downside to tonight's episode is a Tom/Lynette subplot which makes Tom look like a complete jerk, but at least he takes his shirt off. We're not made of stone, you know.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Frank 'n' sense

BIRTH! Shameless, Channel 4, 10.00pm

ShamelessThis series of Shameless has been a marathon rather than a sprint, though we're not about to say it isn't an excellent thing to see British dramas being commissioned for longer-running series like wot they do in America. Audience reaction to this series has been a little varied, with some thinking it's a series too far, others thinking that it's still a great show, just not the same great show it started out as, and still others thinking that it's been fucking great since day one, and if anyone disagrees I'LL FUCKIN' 'AVE YER. Sorry. Came over a bit Chatsworth there. Our opinion? We want more of Mickey and his "fook-shia" stretch limo. Just look at his little face up there! Bless.

We finish at a suitably climactic time for the first family of Chatsworth as a minor earthquake causes Frank to fall off his barstool and into a coma, and causes Monica's waters to break. Cue mayhem as Monica is determined to hold the baby in until Frank's by her side, and Debbie's determined not to let her know that Frank is unconscious in hospital. And while Frank and Monica have never been the most likeable characters in the history of television, this episode gives them both a chance to be a bit heartwarming; Monica's heart-to-heart with Ian is one of the best scenes of the whole series.

Meanwhile, we get a peek at the terrifying workings of Frank's mind while he's dead to the world, including Ian as a ladychasing wideboy, Debbie in a fat suit, Norma apparently dressed up for drag cabaret and a brilliant almost-return from the much-missed Sheila, though we won't spoil precisely how that presents itself...

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Monday, April 14, 2008

China in their hands

RUNWAY! America's Next Top Model, Living, 9.00pm

America's Next Top ModelWhat an odd cycle of America's Next Top Model this has been, what with Tyra's insistence on making everything green-friendly, the plus-size girl who really didn't look plus-size, the elimination of Heather, who many presumed would win the whole thing, in fifth place, then the elimination of house bitch Bianca before the final, leaving us in the unfamiliar position of being stank-free for the finale. Oh, and Saleisha's makeover. Nothing beats that for oddness: let's take a pleasant-looking if unremarkable girl and give her a pudding bowl haircut, assuring her all the while that it's high fashion when really she looks like a cross between a Beatle and Bob the Builder.

Nonetheless, we have our final three for this cycle in the form of Chantal, Saleisha and Jenah. And as we said right back when we previewed the first episode, we called the winner right from the very beginning, purely based on our understanding of how the show works after sitting through all eight damn "cycles". But assuming there are any of you out there who have managed to get this far while remaining unspoiled (and seriously, if you have: kudos, because we're beginning to think it's not humanly possible), we're not going to tell you who it is. Although we will admit that we don't always read this show as well as we think we can, because another of the girls in the top two is one we wrote off as fodder in the early stages. It just goes to show that Tyra likes to throw a curveball as much as the next person. A fierce curveball though, obviously.

This being the final, the hurdles that remain to be jumped are rather predictable: the three remaining girls have to film an ad for CoverGirl, so best wrap your brain up in some sturdy insulation lest you be hypnotised into believing that you too are in serious need of a peach-flavoured Wetslick. Following that there'll be one final elimination, and the top two girls will have a walk-off in a typically fake-looking runway show - this year with the added bonus of one girl accidentally knocking over a poor unfortunate Chinese extra on stilts. But who will it be, and will it cost her the win? We can barely contain ourselves, in much the same way that Tyra's dresses can often barely contain her.

Oh, and if you think this cycle was ass-crazy? Wait until cycle ten. Seriously.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

Shedding Skins

OVER! Skins, E4, 10.00pm

So now we know that tonight's Skins series two finale is not just goodbye to the gang for another year, or even just goodbye to Chris. No, this is goodbye to everyone except Effy and maybe some of her random friends that pop up every now and then, as the people behind the show have decided that they are changing the cast every two years because it's a show that 'represents being 16-18'. Which would be fair enough if it bore any resemblance whatsoever to being 16-18, but anyway. Maybe we're just pissy because our lives were never this exciting or glamorous when we were young.

Whether this decision turns out to be a masterstroke that ensures the show's longevity, or its death knell remains to be seen, but for now there are lots of questions we hope they'll answer before sending the current crop of characters off into the big wide world. Questions such as: 'why was Cassie in New York last week?', 'what will Jal do with the baby?', 'will Tony and Michelle be a couple again?', 'will Maxxie get his top off again?' and 'will Anwar actually get any lines?'

This series overall has been darker, smarter, funnier and deeper than its predecessor, although at times it has been too self-aware and some of the storylines and characters have occasionally teetered into the territory of just being a little bit annoying. As with series one, they have also sometimes skimmed over certain so-called main characters, which is a shame. These are minor qualms, but we hope the writers address these tendencies before the new series, or else it could run the risk of just becoming self-parody.

Anyway, we're sure tonight's episode will be something of a tear-jerker as the gang attend Chris' funeral, receive their A-Level results and make plans for the future. Whatever happens to Skins from here on in, it has launched some excellent young actors, created a very strong brand identity and re-established the teen drama as something acceptable to like for even the most highbrow of viewers (not that we ever had a problem with teen drama, mind).

Goodbye, then Chris, Cassie, Jal, Tony, Maxxie, Michelle, Anwar and Sid (and Posh Kenneth, Abigail and Sketch). We'll miss you...

Labels: , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Sunday, April 13, 2008

(Ship)Wrecked for Success

CAST AWAY! Shipwrecked, Channel 4, 11.55am

Your Sunday lie-in has just gotten longer, with the return of Shipwrecked. As with the previous two series, it's going to run for months and each episode is going to be hours long. Today's opener is just over 90 minutes, plus a secondary show that lasts 35 minutes. That's over two hours of your day watching this show. Every week. To be fair, you probably spend even longer than that watching the Come Dine With Me omnibus on a Sunday afternoon anyway, so it shouldn't be too taxing.

For those that aren't familiar with the show, two teams of young and beautiful people spend weeks on end stranded on two desert islands. Each island has its own team, The Tigers or The Sharks, and they spend the coming weeks trying to recruit other members to their gang. The team with the most members at the end of the weeks wins. And, err, that's pretty much it. Although there's always the chance of them getting 'possessed' like LC forum user and Shipwrecked alumnus, Rory.

However, despite the tasks the teams take on being minimal, despite them repeatedly having arguments about rice, getting together and breaking up and the continued shouts of 'sharrrrrks' and 'tiiiigerrrs' and despite it going on FOREVER it still manages to be entertaining. We're not saying this has anything to do with the fact that they are all always barely clothed. But it might be.

Labels: , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Saturday, April 12, 2008

Anna Friel, like I just got home, Anna Friel...*

BRIGHT! Pushing Daisies, ITV1, 9.00pm

Pushing DaisiesIt's not what you think; I haven't found a way to post from the future. Not yet, anyway; it's just that I'm going to be away on Saturday, and I thought I could justify giving a little bit more airtime than usual to Pushing Daisies, given that it's one of ITV's most high-profile launches in ages.

Of course, Gossip Girl had a massive advertising push and it didn't really translate into bringing in the viewers in their millions, so it's very daring of ITV to push ahead with Pushing Daisies, which is arguably not even close to your typical ITV show, on a primetime slot on Saturday night no less. (I note with interest that it's directly after the series opener of Britain's Got Talent, so at least it stands to inherit a healthy audience, as long as it can hold onto it.) It's especially bold considering this is a show that's bound to be polarising: you'll either be charmed by its limitless sense of whimsy and innocence, or you'll be nauseated by all the pastel shades and the self-conscious tweeness.

Thankfully I'm in the former camp: I found the pilot episode enthralling. The show is utterly divorced from reality in every possible way, but it actually makes an asset of this - there's a sense that genuinely anything could happen on this show. For those of you unfamiliar with the extremely high concept: Piemaker Ned has an unusual gift, in that his touch can bring the dead back to life. But this gift has its limitations - if he touches that person again, they die permanently this time, and if he doesn't return the body to a dead state within a specified period of time, someone else dies in their place.

Ned's working in conjunction with a private eye, interrogating murder victims to collect the reward money, when he finds that one of the victims is his childhood sweetheart Chuck (short for Charlotte Charles, in case you were wondering). Having revived her, he finds he can't bring himself to let her die again - but this means any potential for romance with them is doomed, because one touch from Ned will kill Chuck forever.

That's what made the show work for me - that undercurrent of darkness that belies the kitsch visual style and the apple-pie sweetness. The show's cast is great too: Lee Pace is adorably awkward as Ned, Anna Friel captures Chuck's playfulness superbly and with a flawless American accent to boot, Kristen Chenoweth plays Olive Snook, the waitress with a doomed crush on Ned, Ellen Greene and Swoosie Kurtz play Chuck's oddball aunts (there's a fantastic visual gag involving Aunt Lily's missing eye, by the way) and my favourite character is Emerson Cod, the aforementioned shady PI, played by Chi McBride.

It's not going to be to everyone's taste, but I strongly recommend you give it a go. Just keep a pair of sunglasses next to the remote control, just in case a migraine kicks in.

*This joke is approximately eight years old, but I still couldn't resist using it. Sorry.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Friday, April 11, 2008

Seacrest and sighs

CHARITY! American Idol, ITV2, 9.00 & 11.00pm

American IdolIt seemed like an odd idea last year: for a show like American Idol that's always felt to be unashamedly about generating extra sources of revenue for record companies to suddenly develop a conscience - especially after foisting Taylor Hicks on an unsuspecting universe the year before - and devote an entire programme to raising money for charity felt weird, somehow. As though we were constantly expecting Ryan Seacrest to announce the whole thing had been an elaborate wind-up and all the donations were going to fund Clive Davis's next annual bonus instead. But no, they raised over $70 million to help fight poverty, and the whole thing was such a success, they're going to do it again this year, and make it bigger. Ah, now that feels like American Idol.

While the whole thing might sound like a rather cringe-worthy effort, there's enough corporate muscle behind the whole thing to pull in some seriously A-list stars, including the likes of Brad Pitt, Mariah Carey and Bono (it was inevitable that he'd turn up, wasn't it?), alongside some slightly less amazing but still bankable stars like Fergie, Celine Dion, Vanessa Hudgens and Miley Cyrus (who, we're sure, was just bein' Miley), as well as Idol alumni such as Fantasia, Elliott Yamin, DAUGHTRY!!11!, and Carrie Underwood.

Last night, the Idols sang "inspirational songs" to gain public support (and really, David Archuleta, 'Angels' inspires us to do a lot of things, none of them good) and following the charity event, there's the inevitable results show. Last year the overwhelming sense of charity so touched the heart of the Idol producers that they decided they couldn't possibly have an elimination on charity night - but will they pull that trick again this year? Or will they decide that the truly charitable thing is to put one of this year's contestants out of their misery and send them home? Either way, we'll find out later.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Thursday, April 10, 2008

A recipe for success

COOKING! Celebrity Come Dine With Me, Channel 4, 8.00pm

Celebrity Come Dine With MeIt's the moment we've all been waiting for (to clarify, by "we all", we mean "everyone who's unwittingly lost an entire Sunday afternoon watching the omnibus of the daytime edition on More4"): Come Dine With Me has achieved the Holy Grail of daytime television and secured itself a primetime slot. To say that we're excited by this prospect is a bit like saying David Platt is ever so slightly unstable.

If you're one of the unfortunate sorts who's yet to experience the show in all its glory, we'll explain the format for you, though please be aware that you really can't capture the brilliance of this series with the written word alone: a group of strangers from the same town are united for a series of dinner parties with each of them taking it in turns to play host, while being scored by the others out of ten, with the highest-scoring host of the week taking home £1000 for their trouble. But that's really only half the fun: the best parts are the bits where they get to snoop around each others' houses and judge people according to their material possessions, and some of the utterly insane cooking techniques and recipes (fruit coulis made by mixing jam and hot water?), as well as the people with severely skewed ideas of how to host a party, such as leaving people standing on the doorstep in the cold for daring to arrive five minutes early.

Admittedly the celebrities lined up for this edition are not exactly what you'd call A-list, but there's definite potential for hilarity here: It Girl Tamara Beckwith, pop star Lynsey de Paul, musician and owner of the UK's best publicised relationship downgrade MC Harvey, and one quarter of G4, Jonathan Ansell (just four contestants rather than five, the better to squeeze into the tiny 60 minute timeslot). We have no idea what's on any of the menus, but we wouldn't be surprised to see any of them whip out the classic ice-cream topped with crushed Maltesers dish, frankly.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Ready Steady G(T)O

SINITTA! Ready Steady Cook, BBC Two, 4.30pm


We haven't watched Ready Steady Cook for years. We kind of lost interest in it when Fern left and all the famous chefs followed her, and they changed the bloody format / we were working full-time and couldn't watch it any more (delete as you feel applicable).

But we felt we ought to point out today's episode to you, because Sinitta is on it. That's right, Sinitta.

Arrange your excuses to leave work early today now.

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

Re: construction

BEENY! Property Ladder, Channel 4, 8.00pm

Property LadderWe've been hurt far too many times before, and we're not going to let it happen again: Channel 4 may be crowing about its new series of Property Ladder (and fair's fair, the house-that-Jack-built themed trailer is very cute), but our defences are well and truly up this time. We're not going to have our hearts stolen by promises of how it will all be different this time, how they truly respect us, how they only want to make us happy, only for it to end up the same way it always does: a handful of genuinely new episodes before the rest of the series is padded out with barely-concealed repeats with five minutes worth of previously unseen material tacked on to the end, leaving us with the sinking feeling that we've been led up the garden path. Again. Sigh.

It's not that we don't enjoy any opportunity to watch this show, of course - it's just that sometimes we wonder if we wouldn't rather hang on until there's enough material to make up a whole new series, even if it means that new series come around less often. After all, if we want to watch repeats, we can just flick over to More 4 and watch a whole row of them in one go - and at least then we're prepared to watch a repeat, rather than tuning in bright-eyed in the hope of seeing all new development fuckups, only to realise five minutes in that we've seen this one before. That way we'd really be able to get excited about a new series again, rather than thinking "oh, how nice. It's back again after about a three week absence."

However, we're not going to let this sudden attack of curmudgeonliness stand in the way of what is still good news: brand new episodes of Property Ladder, however small the quantity. There are few joys in this world greater than witnessing Sarah Beeny smile through clenched teeth as she listens to yet another prospective developer's hair-brained scheme about how ripping out the kitchen and replacing it with a home cinema system will raise the market value by 15%. And let's not forget the drinking game, where you take a swig every time Sarah's voiceover says "but I'm not so sure that's a good idea", and hope you can still stand by the time 9pm rolls around. God bless you, Dame Sarah, and your formidable bosom. As ever, you have the patience of a saint.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Boogie Woogie - Live!

MUSIC! Later... Live, BBC Two, 10.00pm

We are officially our grandparents. Because we are at that stage of life where very few things are not like they were in 'our day'. And one of those things that was very much better in our day was music television.

When we were whippersnappers, there was Top of The Pops, The Chart Show, The Tube and later The White Room, as well as music on all kinds of other shows, not least Saturday morning kids' TV, which is now also defunct. Oh, and David Hunter will no doubt tell us that in his day you also had Ready, Steady Go and The Old Grey Whistle Test. In this decade pop on mainstream TV is mostly limited to a song during talent show results programmes and the rather ace busking bit on The Culture Show.

So thank heavens for Later... for being one of the last bastions of music telly on the 'proper' channels. OK, it isn't the kind of programme that is going to help children form their music taste, nor is it ever going to promote the shiny pop so many of you are fond of. But it's something.

When we heard about Later... Live we assumed it was a spin-off that would run at different times of the year to the main show. But, er, it isn't. It's actually live performances whilst Friday's show is recording. So on Fridays you'll get to see all this and more because that show is longer. So we're not entirely sure of the point of this one. OK, it has the thrill factor that something kerrazy might happen live, and there is the advantage of it being on a Tuesday and in an earlier slot than the Friday show. But essentially, it's the same beast.

We think it's kind of a missed opportunity when there is obviously scope for more music on TV. Why not commission a new show altogether, or as we thought was the plan, run this at separate times of the year to normal Later? Oh well, as has been well documented on this site, no-one ever listens to our opinion (except the people behing Neighbours). Tonight's stars include Dawn Kinnard, Yeasayer, Glenn Hansard and Marketa Irglova, Natty (pictured), The Kooks, and LC faves Goldfrapp. We are ashamed to admit we've only heard of two of those acts - but admit it, so have most of you...

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
4 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Monday, April 07, 2008

The geek shall inherit the earth

NERD! Chuck, Virgin 1, 10.00pm

ChuckYou may have noticed us going on extensively about how much we were looking forward to this one in our preview of Reaper a few months ago. They both have the same jumping off point, in that they focus on amiable slackers suddenly being thrust into death-defying scenarios on a weekly basis, but from there they head in different directions: Reaper is a sci-fi/fantasy comedy, whereas Chuck is more of an espionage drama with chuckles thrown in. Alias with more humour and less brain-melting complexity, if you like. And also minus the wigs, to our great regret.

The main plot thrust of the show reminds us a little bit of our much-missed Jake 2.0, in that Chuck is a charming nerd who gets thrust into a world he's entirely unfamiliar with after he accidentally reads an e-mail from his old friend-slash-adversary Bryce, since it turns out the e-mail was filled with top secret government information that somehow is directly transferred into his brain. Obviously this makes him a target for all kinds of ne'er-do-wells who want access to what lurks in his head, but since Chuck is hapless and not trained in self-defence, he's assigned help in the form of comely CIA agent Sarah Walker, who's in charge of making sure he doesn't carp it - at least not until they've worked out how to get all the information out of his brain again.

It sounds generic, and in a lot of ways it is, but it's a pretty charming show nonetheless. Those of you who, like us, were glued to the ABC1 channel before it got put out to pasture will probably recognise lead actor Zachary Levi from his stint on not-especially-funny Sara Rue vehicle Less Than Perfect (he was also in Big Momma's House 2, but let's not hold that against him), and his chemistry with co-star Yvonne Strahovski crackles nicely in the pilot. But our favourite part of the show, one that we hope gets more screentime in later episodes since his time in the pilot was tragically limited, is Chuck's sister's boyfriend, Captain Awesome. We'd explain why, but the name pretty much sums it up.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

When I am through with you, there won't be anything left

ANSWERS! Damages, BBC One, 10.35pm

Finally, our hard work and dedication is going to be paid off. We hope. After thirteen heart-thumping, gut-wrenching, brain-scratching weeks, Damages reaches its climax tonight. Well, the climax of series one, but we have every faith they'll tie up at least most of the plot threads, or else we'll be tracking the writers down with spiky bookends.

This series, rubbish timeslot aside, has been one of our biggest loves of 2008. We loved the acting, the tension, the trying to figure out just what-the-hell-was-going-on. After last week, the mystery of who killed David was (solved (well, we think), but not the mystery of what will happen to Ellen, or of the grave Patty was visiting, or of what Katie Connor ACTUALLY knows, and of course, we don't know what the outcome of the whole case is going to be.

Glenn Close and Ted Danson have put in amazing performances as Patty Hewes and Ted Frobisher, and the supporting cast have been equally great. We could do without the Ellen storyline invoking The Devil Wears Prada quite so much, but hopefully that will all change for any future series.

We are very glad we stuck through this, and even more glad we managed to avoid spoilers from all our friends who sneakily got ahead of the game. Let's hope our perseverance pays off (and that any future series are scheduled more sensibly).

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Saturday, April 05, 2008

The Sunshine After the Rain



NOBLE! Doctor Who, BBC One, 6.20pm

Well, thank goodness Doctor Who is back to save us from the maudlin state that last night's Torchwood finale put us in. We're not sure we could have coped without something to see us through.

It seems an eternity since Dame Martha Jones bid the Doctor farewell and almost as long since Kylie died in the Christmas special. But here we are, ready for thirteen weeks of new adventures. The start of a new series of Who is always a funny experience. We simultaneously want all thirteen weeks to come at once so we can find out what happens, and want them to be stretched out even longer so it doesn't have to end. That feeling is even more acute as we have heard some tantalising rumours about the content of this series, yet we know we will be restricted to a mere handful of specials in 2009 rather than a series 'proper'.

Tonight sees the return of Donna Noble, and we just think Catherine Tate will be brilliant in this series. She's not going to be the only returnee, either, as during the course of its run, a whole plethora of old friends and enemies return. If you don't know who at least some of them are, well done you, for being able to hide under a rock. And if you've managed to avoid spoilers for now, we son't ruin that for you. Suffice to say, we are excited about pretty much everything we've heard about what's ahead - and even more so about all the things we haven't yet heard about.

And, of course, there are also lots of new faces for us to get used to. Tonight's episode introduces us to a new alien race, the Adipose, and the rather fabulous looking Miss Foster, played by Sarah Lancashire (one of many, many awesome guest stars lined up for the course of series 4). Who is she? What is Adipose industries? And what is that familiar-looking little tool she has with a blue light....?

CLASSICS! Verity Lambert Night, BBC Four, 7.10pm

It is only fitting that the first night of the new series of Doctor Who is also Verity Lambert night. A tribute to one of Who's creators and one of TV's top producers, it includes lots of old Who, The Naked Civil Servant, Minder, Jonathan Creek and a documentary about the life and work of the goodlady herself (which airs at 9.50pm). Watch in awe at just how much amazing one person can produce in their lifetime.

And apologies for the spoiler-tastic post about Torchwood's finale that was here earlier. We've taken it down now, which we know doesn't help anyone who happened to see it already. For our penance we will watch the whole of David Enchilada's performance AND talky bit to camera on American Idol next week. Twice.

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Friday, April 04, 2008

Fade to Gray

DANGER! Torchwood, BBC Two, 9.00pm

We are sad to see that this is the last episode in what has largely been a rip-roaring, emotional, tense, funny, Cardiff-centric series of Torchwood (although we couldn't be happier with the timing that means this ends and Doctor Who begins). As much as anything, this series has been a lot of fun.

From seeing Ianto being given a lot more lines and growing to be funny and generally just amazing, to the wonderful plethora of guest stars (including James Marsters, Ruth Jones, Richard Briers, Nerys Hughes and JIM ROBINSON), to the presence of our lovely Martha Jones, to Rhys and PC Andy being generally fabulous, to kick-ass lesbian Victorian Torchwood, to Owen finally becoming likeable, it's been a pretty darn good few weeks in Cardiff.

But tonight's finale scares us a little. We're sure it will be exciting, dramatic and probably also quite funny. But all the previews we have read say it's going to be 'shocking' and 'sad'. If you remember back to the opening episode, Captain Jack's former partner and fellow time agent, Captain John arrived in Cardiff with a grudge against Jack and left having gained a poodle fetish and vowing revenge. He also told us he'd 'found Gray'. Later episodes revealed that Gray is John's brother who went missing when they were children.

We were left at the end of the last episode with John's Star Wars style hologram telling Jack he was coming back to wreck his life. And we saw that he had Gray.

So what will happen tonight? Will Gray and Jack be reunited, or will Gray be lost forever? Will our plucky team survive? Will beautiful Cardiff remain intact? Will Owen die again? Will Tosh get to leave for a better job and a happier life as her five-year contract comes to an end? (We dearly hope so, but we are scared because Russell T Davies and co were saying on Torchwood Declassified the other week that they never let Tosh have happy endings. Let's hope she will finally get one? Please? Pretty please?)

We have no idea, but we're looking forward to (and also dreading a little bit) finding out...

Labels: , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
4 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Thursday, April 03, 2008

You're a total lightweight

BUFFOONERY! The Apprentice: Worst Decisions Ever, BBC Two, 9.00pm


If yesterday was slim pickings for previews, then today is even worse. (Don't worry, though, the next ten or so days are jam-packed). The best we can come up with is a a clip show, we're afraid. We also don't have much to say about it, sorry, because, well, it's a clip show. What is there to say?

Realising they have a ratings winner on their hands, the BBC have commissioned a few of these occasional clip shows to pop up during this series of The Apprentice. Tonight's is The Worst Decisions Ever which should give you a chance to relive the joy of laughing at the hapless 'entrepreneurs' and their failure to achieve in anything remotely resembling 'business'.

We fully expect Makro cheese and one chicken per pizza to feature, but what we really want to know is if last night's bullshit firing makes the cut.

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Wednesday, April 02, 2008

It's my anus, doctor. I need you to take a look at my anus.

ILLNESS! Street Doctor, BBC One, 7.30pm

Street DoctorIn all fairness, last Wednesday's double-whammy of new series of both The Apprentice and Desperate Housewives was always going to be a hard one to top, but we didn't expect there to be such slim pickings in terms of noteworthy new programmes to write about this week. Just when we thought all was lost, however, our eyes happened to flick up to the top of the page of the Radio Times and we had our eureka moment: a new series of Street Doctor. Hooray!

Admittedly, our exposure to this show has almost entirely been via Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe which covered this show in quite literally gruesome detail during its last series. In fact, here it is, just in case you missed it:



We apologise if you happened to be eating when you watched that, but in fairness, so were we the first time. It's unpleasant, but ultimately character-forming. We hope.

The quartet of peripatetic medics are taking to the streets of Chester this week, though we suspect it's too much to hope for some kind of crossover with Hollyoaks where they trace the entire country's bone marrow database in the space of thirty seconds, identify the father of a bastard child just by quickly glancing at it sideways, and point out to the entire population under the age of fifty that there might be fewer unplanned pregnancies if they just learn to use contraceptives properly. Instead, we can only assume there'll be more sores, bruises, varicose veins and (shudder) hammer toes. If you're planning to tune in, be sure to eat well in advance.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Tuesday, April 01, 2008

I'm a celebrity... get me on telly

CELEBRITY QUIZZING! The Weakest Link, BBC One, 5.15pm

Obviously troubled by the dominance of Neighbours in the ratings, the Beeb are beginning to pull out all the stops with this week’s celebrity editions of The Weakest Link, the like of which we usually only get on Saturdays. Tonight’s special is a reality television stars’ edition, and it’s a good one. Amongst the contestants, we have Rory Laing, formerly of The Apprentice (‘I am your boss’) fame. We hope he mentions his zeppelin.

But Rory is not the only highlight tonight. Terri Dwyer, of, erm, ‘60MM’ appears, which will no doubt delight several forum users. What’s more, if the rumours of her and Suzanne Shaw hosting an episode of The Daily Politics for the BBC’s Children in Need Try Something New week prove to be true, her blog hit count is going to go through the roof (well, it may get a couple more LC-based readers, anyway). (Oh, and talking of Try Something New week, Arlene and Bruno taking on What Not To Wear is an inspired move. Len Goodman hosting A Question of Sport less so).

Also appearing is Lisa Scott Lee (but no Johnny, Andy or Michelle, so a Totally Scott-Lee reunion is yet to be. We mourn), who our spies tell us auditioned for I’d Do Anything under a pseudonym and didn’t get past the meet the producers stage. How we LOLled.

Making up the dregs on this’special are Ben Lunt off Shipwrecked (when they could have asked our Rory), Danielle Lloyd, Brian Belo from Big Brother (yawwwwn) and Helena, aka punchable Maria.

But the two star contestants must surely be Myleene Klass (taking time out from her busy schedule appearing in M&S ads and filming Andrew Davies’ adaptation of Judy Blume’s Forever) and John Barrowman (about to start work on Vegas, a sequel to Blackpool. We don’t yet know if his Doctor Who colleagues Sarah Parish and David Tennant will be reprising their roles. What we do know is that Andrew Lloyd Webber’s attempt to be an alien sex monster in Torchwood didn’t get further than asking Barrowman to put a word in with RTD as a kind of return favour for Barrowman being in all his talent shows. Barrowman apparently just laughed…)

Anyway, our money’s on Myleene to win because she’s such a goody-goody, but maybe Rory Laing will spring a surprise victory.

CELEBRITY TOURISM! The Guide To…, More4, 9.30pm

More4 are branching out into populist territory with this new mini-series. Over the next three nights, three celeb docs have been commissioned – much along the lines of The Beginner’s Guide To… religious series, except tackling social and political issues instead.

Anyway, the series kicks off tonight with Sharon Osbourne’s Guide to… Feminist Activism, in which our intrepid host grapples with all the big issues about womanhood in the 21st century. This is followed tomorrow by Nicky Slater's Guide to… Media Law and on Thursday by Jane Horrocks’ Guide to… the Monopolies and Mergers Commission.

We’re guessing this series is an occasional commission (in which case, can we request Nicholas de Lacy Brown’s Guide to... Culture, pls?).

Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
1 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Monday, March 31, 2008

The Butch[er][s] is[/are] back

FRANK! EastEnders, BBC One, Mon & Fri 8.00pm, Tue & Thu 7.30pm

Exciting and solemn (mainly exciting) times in EastEnders this week, as the soap pays a very special tribute to the late Mike Reid with four episodes centred around the funeral of Frank Butcher. Pat and Peggy's health spa / civil partnership witnessing break is interrupted by the arrival of Ricky and Diane (DIANE!) with some grave news about their mutual ex-husband, and over the course of the week the Square's residents (the few who've been in it for longer than two years, anyway) pay their respects in true East End style. There may be piano playing. There could be arguments. It's going to be quite a week.

Of course, it's not Frank's first funeral, and the biggest tragedy of all is that with the magnificent Mike Reid officially dead in real actual life, there's no chance of Frank popping out of the coffin mid-service in one of those moments of supreme good taste with which he was always so closely associated (see Fig. 1). So now the REAL thrill is the return of three of Frank's offspring (advance reports make no mention of Clare 'occasional table' Butcher, the Belinda Slater of the family, but we live in hope), with Sophie Lawrence briefly reappearing as Diane (DIANE!) after her last brief reappearance 11 years ago, Charlie Brooks temporarily dragging Janine out of cold storage for the first time since 2004, and serial returnee Sid Owen returning PERMANENTLY (or at least until the lure of To Buy Or Not To Buy and I'm A Celebrity becomes too great) as Ricky, conveniently at exactly the same time as Patsy Palmer makes a similarly permanent return as Bianca 'the former Mrs Ricky Butcher' Jackson, now with added kids, added not a very good singing voice and apparently no money.

So what's everyone been up to in their absence? Well, Bianca's been collecting kids and failing to have any money (see above), while Ricky's bafflingly been doing rather well for himself money-wise, and has landed a gold-digging girlfriend in the shape of Siobhan 'not former-EastEnder Daniela Denby-Ashe' Hayes from My Family. Janine's been hard at work competing with Leanne Battersby in the perpetual ex-cocaine addict, ex-prostitute, money-grabbing bitch parallel life stakes, and appears to be back mainly for the reading of the will (presumably hoping for some cash to cover the cost of the petrol she's presumably planning to buy for the small Italian restaurant she's presumably been running for about a year - looks like Leanne's about to pip you to the post on that one, Janine!), while Diane (DIANE!) has taken responsibility for her son (the frequently offloaded Jacques), is training to be a doctor and has already trained to be a lesbian, evidently hoping to minimise the risk of accidentally falling into bed with Ian Beale or Phil Mitchell during her slight return to Albert Square.

Naturally, the return of Sophie Lawrence is the most exciting part of all this for us, with the early-90s episode where Frank found Diane (DIANE!) living in Paris being our earliest memory of that peculiarly EastEnders thing of having someone only appear right at the very end of an episode and then putting them at the top of the cast list in the end credits, adding SIGNIFICANCE and INTRIGUE and EXCITEMENT to their appearance. And clearly no post about Sophie Lawrence and Butchery would be complete without this:



Or even THIS:



Superb.

Elsewhere, Pat and Peggy obviously use the funeral as an excuse for another punch-up, selfish Chelsea goes in search of her apparently-selfish father to erroneously claim some bone marrow or bum some cash for a dress or something, and Honey probably does the whole death-related malapropism thing quite a lot (to death, in fact). Ricky, Diane (DIANE!), Janine: please accept our sincerest condonances.

Labels: , , , , , ,

By Nick :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

Teenage rampage

CALAMITY! Neighbours, Five, 1.45pm, 5.30pm, 5.10 am; Five Life, 7.00pm

We are pleased to see that the writers and producers of Neighbours take the advice of lowculture seriously. We refer you back to December 10, 2007, when we gave them a list of tips to make the show better.

Our tips included:
» Axe Ned (we don't want to give too much away here, but... squeeee!)

» The Parker family (Ned aside) could have potential if they are actually rewritten a bit. Someone on the message boards commented that Dad Parker is trying to fill the nice guy role of Philip Martin, but doesn't quite achieve it. That's because Philip Martin had suffered being married to Julie, then seeing her die, and being dad to all those horrible kids. Then he married Ruth, who had a bit of sass, and thus was a good foil for him. So, we'd like to see Miranda (mum) Parker, either developing her Ruth/Susan/Janelle sass - which we feel is unlikely, seeing as in Neighbours, that sass is usually formed by being dicked over by a man and not standing for it - or, our preferred option, becoming the new Julie/Hilary/Mrs Mangel. The street needs a new busybody, and she could easily be it. Riley is decent enough eye candy, but he needs to take his shirt off a bit more, get screwed over by Elle Robinson and go all dewey-eyed with tears. And get a plotline. 'Didge' either needs to get over herself, fast, or die in a freak accident. (Seriously. We rocked this one. Every point ticked. Well Elle hasn't screwed Riley over yet, but surely it's a matter of time)

» All good Neighbours casts have a teenage gang. The current bunch of teenagers barely even speak to one another. Get them bonding, stat.

And it is to this last point which we now come. They have, indeed, bonded the group of teenagers (well, except Declan, who appears to have been missing in action for weeks), and added in new kids Josh, Jessica and Taylah to boot, as well as a ginger school bully. However, tonight's episode is the 2007 series finale. Previous series finales have included Lassiter's blowing up, the plane crash and other such death-ridden catastrophes. So what we are saying is that we hope you haven't got too much emotion invested in the current teen gang, OK?

You may have noticed that there is an ILLEGAL! DANCE! PARTY! taking place. And regular viewers will know that Neighbours takes a dim view of teenagers doing illegal activities, particularly if dancing, or sexing, or drugzing, or drinking might be involved. So let's just say this dance party is probably not going to go anywhere good.

With Rachel and her current-inappropriate-but-cute-teacher-shag-Angus, Zeke, Didge, Ringo, Declan (maybe?), Riley, Taylah, Jess, Josh, presumably the ginger bully, Elle and Riley (demonstrating mad undercover journalistic skillz), and, inexplicably, Libby and Karl all on the premises, will everyone make it out alive? And will anyone develop temporary disabilities that will magically go away in five weeks' time?

We're not saying. But if the producers are reading, we're still waiting for Steph and Toadie to have some kids, and for someone to go on that Cuba trip. You know it makes sense...

Labels: , , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
2 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Sunday, March 30, 2008

O Brother(s and Sisters), where art thou?

SIBLINGS! Brothers and Sisters, E4, 11.00pm

Brothers and SistersThere's a bit of an interesting disconnect in the E4 marketing department at the moment, or so it seems to us. They're certainly not shy about running lots of trails announcing the return of this show, citing the opportunity to "see it first" on E4, and making it all sound like a very special viewer-centric offer. But then you get to the end of the trail and you notice that it's on Sunday nights at 11pm, which seems less like a hot premiere spot and more like the sort of scheduling graveyard where you stick something you're contractually bound to show at some point even though you don't really want to. And the "see it first" thing sounds a bit odd when we can't find it anywhere in the Channel 4 schedules right now (based solely on the Radio Times website programme search, so we fully admit we haven't looked very hard).

We're assuming this has something to do with the show not rating all that well when it had a slightly more prestigious timeslot on Channel 4 last year, which is a shame really, because we rather liked it. But then, it is understandable that a series about a rich WASP-y family in America divided by politics and their own infinite dysfunctions isn't necessarily everyone's cup of tea, especially when large chunks of time pass in this show where nothing very much happens. Interestingly, though, Dirty Sexy Money, focusing also on a rich dysfunctional family, was rating very healthily on Friday nights on Channel 4 last time we checked. Just goes to show how the viewing public are unpredictable, really (for more information on this, look at our gushing post from Thursday about how much we love Gossip Girl and then look at the ratings. Ouch).

Anyway, we are perhaps at least partially responsible for the drop in ratings towards the end since the latter half of the series coincided with us moving house and never being in to watch telly very much and being without access to broadband catch-up services for a couple of weeks (we almost didn't make it), so we've had to consult the internets to find out how season one ended: Rebecca revealed she had an affair with a teacher when she was sixteen, Justin got sent to Iraq, Kitty and Robert got engaged, Saul was maybe a homosexual, and Kevin made out with Robert's brother. Awesome. In tonight's episode, it's Kitty's birthday again (which the avid fans amongst you will remember is how season one started, and prompted the passing of Papa Walker) and Rebecca's throwing them a shindig at a Tex Mex bar. And they all, in a completely unprecedented moment of character development, proceed to get wankered and maudlin. No doubt the twelve of us who loved season one will lap it up.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

Let us clay

SCREAM! Clay, BBC One, 3.30pm

You know how they don't make Sunday afternoon family telly like they used to in our day? Some of us may well be more than happy with the More4 Sunday afternoon of coooking greatness Come Dine With Me, Jame at Home and whatever River Cottage programme is on that week, but won't somebody please think of the children? And the non-foodies?

Well, today they have. Clay is one of those dramas that would feel more at home on a Bank Holiday, perhaps, but it's nonetheless a welcome addition to a lacklustre "big five channels" Sunday afternoon schedule.

Starring Imelda Staunton, which is always reason enough to preview anything, it is a 'family' drama based on a 'best-selling' (we haven't heard of it, but then we were twelve a very long time ago) book by David Almond. The story is set in Tyneside in the 1960s and features a boy called Davie Hagan making friends with a strange man, Stephen Rose who has been expelled from priesthood training. Imelda plays Davie's auntie.

Stephen has a 'talent' for making life-like clay models and one day he makes one that appears to be very life-like and has been made with the intention of obeying its creators. That surely can't be a good thing...

Labels: , , , ,

By Rad :: Post link :: ::  
1 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Friday, March 28, 2008

Nobody sees the show, not 'til her heart says so

MUSICAL! The Passions of...Girls Aloud, ITV2, 10.00pm

The Passions of Girls AloudWe rather deliberately let the first couple of episodes of this series pass without a mention on the front page. Not because we weren't interested in Cheryl learning the art of street dance, or Sarah getting the hang of playing polo, but just because we wanted to wait until we could talk about the episode we really wanted to see. Now it's finally arrived, so we're lifting our embargo, and we're getting very excited at the prospect of watching Kimberley audition for Les Miserables.

The reason that we're so excited about this one is not because we're a bunch of jazz-hands loving theatre gays (honest), but more because Kimberley's our stealth favourite member of Girls Aloud, by virtue of being the one you could imagine yourself being mates with and hanging around down the pub without too much of a stretch. She (and also Nicola, to a similar extent, and in the interests of fairness we're also very excited about next week's show in which Nicola launches a range of cosmetics for fair-skinned people) is the one who's maintained a pleasant sense of normality despite being in a very good and successful girlband, and for that reason we're utterly entranced by her.

So we've got every available digit crossed in the hope that Kimba's journey, involving her working with the best trainers that musical theatre has to offer, not just in London but also in New York, is a successful one. Although hopefully not so successful that she drops out of the band to spend the next three years playing Eponine, obviously. Then we'd be the miserable ones.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Thursday, March 27, 2008

Hot gossip

XOXO! Gossip Girl, ITV2, 10.00pm

Gossip Girl"Hey Upper East (of the internet) Siders, lowculture here. Spotted: hot new US import making itself comfortable with the new neighbours on ITV2. Our spies say they saw her cosying up with new gal pal Bionic Woman, and we're just dying to know what C and her Real Women are making of it all. You know you love us. XOXO, lowculture."

Okay, fine, so we couldn't quite keep it up to write the entire entry in salacious gossip blog speak, but don't let that put you off: Gossip Girl is our new favourite show. (And yes, we're aware we say that on a regular basis, but we really mean it this time.) It's from the creators of The OC (who have apparently learned their lesson, since Mischa Barton is nowhere to be seen) and based on the teen novels by Cecily von Zeigesar, but this is all irrelevant background in relation to the fact that it is a soapy teen drama with possibly the hottest ensemble cast we've ever seen. Seriously, there is not a faulty gene anywhere on this show, and you could cut glass with the cheekbones. Someone give the casting director a medal. And what makes it all even more satisfying is that despite the occasional smell-the-fart moment from Chace Crawford (and please ignore his bad hair in the opening episode - it gets infinitely better in episode two, at which point he becomes so pretty you might actually cry), the acting is right on the money as well, especially Leighton Meester as queen bee Blair Waldorf.

In case you're wondering why you should care about any of this, here's the plot rundown: former wild child Serena van der Woodsen is spotted at Grand Central Station after fleeing without explanation some months hence, much to the delight of Nate Archibald, who's been nursing a crush on Serena since forever, but to the chagrin of Nate's girlfriend and Serena's former BFF Blair Waldorf. Meanwhile, Dan and Jenny Humphrey are meant to be impoverished even though you could fit the whole of lowculture towers into their kitchen, and Chuck Bass is the person of whom you see a picture if you look up the word "skeezy" in the dictionary, but is no less awesome for this. (He is possibly less awesome for his predilection for rape, mind.)

You may be wondering where the Gossip, and indeed the Girl, come in. That's the best part: since the lead characters are, for the most part, the ridiculously moneyed offspring of equally ridiculously moneyed socialites, they are minor celebrities in their own right, and their every move is chronicled by a catty blogger known only as Gossip Girl, never seen, but voiced to perfection by Veronica Mars's Kristen Bell. Seriously, we can't think of another actor who can put as much life into the signoff "XOXO" as she does.

What's refreshing about all this is that the characters are all surprisingly empathetic, despite being richer and prettier and all round generally better than us. Sure, we wanted to smack Dan with a brick for the first few episodes when he wouldn't shut up about the social injustice of being moderately less well-off than everyone else he knows, but he calms down eventually, and we predict future lowculture icon status for bitchy, needy, insecure Blair. And if you need any more reasons to tune in, the episode titles are all mini works of art in themselves, including such inspired puns as "The Wild Brunch", "Bad News Blair" and our personal favourite, "Hi, Society!"

You know you love us. XOXO.

Labels: , ,

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard


Wednesday, March 26, 2008

May the fourth (series) be with you

We are so giddy right now we are in danger of spontaneously combusting. We don't actually want to combust though, because then we'd miss the new series of Doctor Who, the finales of Ashes to Ashes, Torchwood and Damages, the continued aceness of Pulling, Gavin and Stacey and Rock Rivals, the start of Gossip Girl and the return tonight of The Apprentice and Desperate Housewives. But we ask you, seriously, how much excitement are we expected to take all within the course of one month?

SUGAR! The Apprentice, BBC One, 9.00pm and The Apprentice: You're Fired, BBC Two, 10.00pm

The fourth series of The Apprentice is an event in the lowculture that will probably only be equalled in terms of anticipation by the fourth series of Doctor Who. Already a sweepstake is under way on the forum and there is fevered discussion about the contestants themselves. The most intriguing/bonkers contestant is almost certainly going to be Nicholas de Lacy Brown, mind.


We don't know what this series will have up its sleeve to master the triumphs of the last three series ('I AM your boss', The Badger's house-selling, lips for sin, James selling wooly jumpers, Simon and the trampoline, titties and fish, cooking on a bean can, Paul Tulip being fired for being a big fat liar etc) although we imagine the scandals of previous series (Miriam's shock firing, Karen's shock firing, Naomi's shock firing), the unfairness of the finale (fierce contestant vs wet and dull and often incompetent contestant as